Wednesday, August 22, 2007

I'm Very Important, I Have Many Leather Bound Books & My Apartment Smells Of Rich Mahogany

Ahhh, the wit & wisdom of Ron Burgundy. Yes, like him, I am very important, have many leather bound books and my apartment smells like rich mahogany. Or maybe not so much rich mahogany as a lot of cleaning supplies.

But wait, before we delve into the mess (literally) that my apartment is, let me just say "You're a dirty pirate hooker. Why don't you go back to your home on Whore Island?" is pretty much one of my favorite Anchorman quotes ever! Oh, and so is "Oh, Baxter, you are my little gentleman. I'll take you to foggy London town 'cause you are my little gentleman. Wow, this burrito is delicious, but it is filling." Yeah, pretty much the whole Burrito/Bike scene is my favorite part of the movie. Jack Black is the best!

And now an update from the world's dirtiest apartment ever. Oh Sweet Lincoln's Mullet, what did I get myself into? Monday was my first night in the new apartment, and yesterday was my first full day. I am overwhelmed with the amount of cleaning this place is going to take to even be halfway to my standard of liveable! I've so far accomplished very little, it feels like, even though I've been at it for two days. The fridge, wow, that was intense. "Like a turd covered in burnt hair". Oh, the Anchorman quotes, how they are a metaphor for my new living situation.

I mean, the payoff will be great - I have my own place, don't have to deal with the Mean Girls, that is to say my old roomates, and I think it's going to look great once I'm done. But the move in was intense, with the world's steepest, narrowest set of back stairs ever before seen by man. Or the Widowmaker as Sam, my neighbor calls them. Yeah, I'm just waiting till I go a'tumblin down those! But the high ceilings, huge windows, amazing sunlight (great for my stil living bamboo) and original woodwork more than makes up for a measly pair of stairs.

All in all I'm happy to be in, and just need to find places for all the stuff I own. Which was 297% more than what I'd ever imagined. I am grateful, now wait, I am GRAAAAAAAAATEFUL to everyone who helped me move in, and owe you all a dinner cooked in my new McNugget stove. It's not quite big enough to cook a whole chicken in, so I may have to cook one McNugget at at time.

I will post pictures once I can find some online that are not really where I live, but that can pass for it, so you all will believe I'm somewhere a lot nicer than Monster House. I make all these jokes, but you know what? I couldn't be happier even if I was riding a huge unicorn up the world's prettiest rainbow with Ron Burgundy at my lovely side - "Take me to Pleasure Town". Oh yeah, I'm already there!

No comments: