Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Community Education

If I were to ever write a book about the concept of Community, I would not need to actually write anything, since I can’t begin to tell you how many half baked blog posts I have about this subject. I got more rhymes than the Bible’s got Psalms…. Sorry, just a little House of Pain there for y’all. I’m warning you, this post is gonna be mad ADD.

Ok, though, getting back to community, and what it means, how it affects our lives, why we need it, etc. I could just go through those old posts, make some sense of them, and boom, a novel. The next great American tome. Minus some focus and coherence and a plotline you can follow. There’s really that much material.

But the thoughts in my head today about relationships and community and my three day weekend and even just life are so much more scattered and random than I can even believe. I am sooo ADD today. Have I said that? And even if I were to try and flesh out my thoughts like I should, I would just end up with more fodder for the make-believe book and non-postable posts. Therefore, I’m just doing bullet points and deal with it.

1. The intimacy of two becoming one is starting to scare me. Is it really just about the day to day? If so, I’m screwed! I don’t want to give away all the little things to someone that’s not my husband. Rob Bell, in his book SexGod, which thankfully hasn’t been about sex that much, says that the whole process of two becoming one isn’t so much about gettin’ it on, as about just doing life together on a small things basis. You know… what kind of sauce do you like for your Chicken McNuggets? Night owl or Early Bird? That kind of stuff. I really hope this isn’t true and that Rob Bell is off his flippin’ rocker.

2. Community is such an amazing thing – being able to kiss my nephew on the head and send him off with a banana bread muffin on his first day of 1st Grade, stoop parties and porch parties and just hanging with the girls, having someone help me fix a tire, picnics in the park, you name it. I’m loving being part of a community and a neighborhood.

3. I can’t do car stuff. I break down and become a totally helpless girl. I panic. I shut down. I turn into the most helpless female ever. Even just driving somewhere I’ve never been to before, at night, alone, is enough to put me into helpless female mode. Like last weekend when I had to drive down to camp on my own, at night, alone, and I was so panicky about it. I did pretty good, and was really proud of myself for it, till I got to LaCrosse, and took the wrong turn and got about 50 miles towards Madison before I realized I was going the wrong way. I had to call R for Roommate and whine and ask for help and endure “Really? You’re lost going to camp?? Really???” before I was able to turn around and head back down the right highway. Then I got as far as Lansing, missed my turn to camp, and was almost to Harpers Ferry before I turned around, crying. As I was wiping the tears away, fearful of hitting a deer or going back to Madison or having to pull off and sleep in my car, I remember wishing for Jesus to speak to me audibly in a voice identical to Josh Turner’s and tell me where to go. Because really, that’s what Jesus sounds like to me – Josh Turner. I hate to admit it, but when it comes to car stuff, directions, flat tires, oil changes, broken mirrors, I really need a man to step in. True story.

4. Diablo Cody is so pretty. Brunettes pretty much rock the beauty world, but she’s just so cool and smart and funny besides. Her and Kat Von D are awesome. I want to be pretty like them. Cool and pretty and smart and inked.

5. Great Is Thy Faithfulness is an awesome hymn. Love it so much! I think it might be my favorite right now. That should change by oh, I don’t know, 6:05. ADD remember?

6. How on earth am I going to get everything done this week? Block Party stuff. Hawaiian Luau Team Building Event stuff? Birthday shopping for Sierra. Painting?? Sleep? Finishing all my library books to get them back fee free?? Sleeping?? Pshaw!

7. I need to apologize to my roommate for posting on facebook that I was going to throw a shoe at his head. I really, really, really needed a nap yesterday and wasn’t getting it because he kept talking to me. I need to learn that it’s ok to communicate my needs to other people (like “Can you please shut your stinking pie hole so I can get a nap here?”) instead of passive-aggressively posting my frustrations in open air. This is a big lesson for me. That and that lack of sleep, sleep deprivation, not sleeping and needing a good night’s sleep all make me crabby. Really really crabby.

8. I want my hair to be long again. I want to be a a bijillion & two sizes smaller, really cute with a button nose and blonde hair. I want the guy I have a crush on to not want that for me and to say I'm crazy because he likes me just as I am - wacky, chubby, brunette with awkward middle-stage hair. I want him to totally see past my faults and embrace my quirkiness. Hell, I embrace all of his, though he’s not really quirky so much as wonderfully amusing and wholesome and normal and nice and totally the mayor of Laugh City.

9. The bathroom upstairs looks like the inside of a chimp cage. Really, the whole house looks like it was vandalized by an errant gang of chimps. I really need to get motivated to clean. Or find a nice Mexican mama-type maid I can pay to do it. Like the maid Nancy Botwin had in the first two seasons of Weeds, minus the morality lectures.

10. My socks are blessed right off my pretty painted feet today thinking of the amazingly fantastical time I had Sunday night with my fellow Dirty Couchers. There about three of you right now who know what I’m talking about, and to you three, I throw off my hat (feathers and all) and applaud your mighty womanly ways. Normally I eschew all traditional female gatherings - too much estrogen on the dance floor. But it’s been a long time since God brought me female friends who didn’t want to sit around and knit or scrapbook and sing As The Deer and then trade recipes for banana bread or watch Christy: The miniseries. I am thankful and I love you all, for being who you are, smart, fierce, wickedly funny, hip and cool and intelligent and cultured and wild, wacky and wonderful. You guys are restoring my faith in the XX Chromosones!

Well, I’m pretty sure that’s about it for me today. I could so use a nap right now, and some more deep fried Cajun spiced pickle, but alas tonight’s another night I have stuff going on. I’m learning to treasure days with nothing planned. I’m sure that I slack enough for four people here during the day, but quiet evenings home alone, with wine and a book and an early bedtime are a luxury I dearly treasure. And I think to myself....what a wondah-ful woild. Till later, thanks for reading, and keep on truckin’!

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